#SOMETHING SOMETHING FIRST LOVE THE TERRIFYING ORDEAL OF BEING KNOWN

[heynhay]

please don't say you love me (x)

[mochinomnoms]

I love all your stuff, it fuels my Octatrio brain rot!

After reading your post on the Azul explaining that marriage contract post, I couldn't help but think of how the tweels would react to seeing people tease yuu about their "engagement" (I'm sure octavinelle students complained to their friends I the other dorm about the very loud mating happening) and some who don't believe it and are stupid enough to flirt with/bully Yuu.

Like Ace would tease them and say "should we call you Mx. Leech from now on?~" while Deuce is "WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?! BLINK TWICE IF THIS IS AGAINST YOUR WILL" and Grim wondering how they can use this to get more tuna

Meanwhile an idiot from Savannahclaw or Diasmonia approaches you and says something like "So your whoring yourself out to non-humans? When's my turn with the magicless bi-" then his body is found at the bottom of a lake somewhere the next day.

Thank you for being a place for us octasimps to gather and spill our thoughts!

(yessss octasimps take residence with meeeee~)

Oh, word gets around soooo quick, no matter how much the twins scare the dorm, Octavinelle students like to gossip. Besides, it's not like the tweels care, they want everyone to know that you're taken! Must be a merfolk thing, because you're trying to hide from the embarrassment of being known as the one who fucked not one, but both Leech twins.

You spend the entire first period ignoring Ace's jests and prodding, while Deuce continuously checked in. He wasn't convinced that you weren't swindled into a contract, please help calm him down, he looks like he's going to cry. Grim is actually disgusted, until he receives a platter of fancy tuna at lunch from an “anonymous” benefactor. Now he's down for anything as long as Jade and Floyd provide him with the most decedent seafood.

You eventually have to run an errand for Crowley during your study period, so you leave Grim with Jack to run it faster without the familiar's interruptions. That's when the scenario above happens:

You're cornered in a hallway by a small group of students, one from each dorm minus Octavinelle. They may gossip, but they certainly know better than the others. The group is jeering and whistling, a Scarabia and Diasomnia student reaching to pinch at your arms and thighs, while a Pomefiore cat beastman croons.

“Aw what's wrong? I thought you liked nonhumans? Huh, no? Well, then maybe you shouldn't have been such a whore for merman dick!”

A few more hands move to grab and push you, intending to take out their long festering anger with the twins on you instead. Intended is the key word here; two towering shadows cover you and the group when two pairs of hands reach for the group leader, the cat from Pomefiore. He screamed before being cut off by a crunch, collapsing on the ground as he groaned and clutched his ribs.

Floyd terrifying when angry, but it's not an unfamiliar sight. But Jade's always had a polite, soft expression. So seeing him with a blank face, but fury filled eyes was like looking into the eyes of the devil himself. Combined that with each other, the twins were like the antichrist given form in the shape of 6'2” sharped tooth mermen. Your mates made quick work of the group, growling insults and promising them that they're being much more merciful than they deserved.

After the whole ordeal, you find yourself being accompanied by Floyd draping his arm around your shoulders as you finish your task. Jade walked off, letting you know that he needed to make sure he reported back the students' behavior to their housewardens. Omitting their latest “scuffle” of course. They should consider themselves lucky that they only walked away with bruised ribs, black eyes, and only one hand and nose were broken! They really went easy!

Everyone knows not to mess with you after that. Everyone should know how protective nonhumans get over their humans, especially moray eels. The sharp teeth aren't for show, you know.

[avoxrising]

The Feral One • Chapter 2

Finnick x Reader

Series Masterlist Link

I had some down time while my flight was delayed so here’s another chapter! Hopefully chapter 3 will come out in a few days but we shall see. Thanks for all the love on the first chapter!

Content warnings - flashback to prostitution assault and detailed descriptions of killing/death

You weren’t always known as a feral victor. Sure, some of your kills in the arena were a bit much, but it’s not uncommon to see that behavior in the games. It is a fight to the death after all. What is uncommon, however, is that literal fight continuing afterwards.

After the incident with the first doctor, which was kept quiet from the public at first, Snow believed you would still be of use from him. He thought the capital doctors could “fix you” and make you “civilized” again. He’s lucky he always had guards with him, or he would have ended up on your list.

Finnick, your mentor, thought that your post-arena violence might save you from his fate in the capital. He tried to convince Snow that it wasn’t a good idea to assign you clients, that you were unpredictable and things could go very wrong. Snow thought it would be fine.

“Sure she may put up a fight,” he told Finnick, “most of them do. But, I don’t think that should be an issue for her client. He could break her quite easily if he needed to.”

And break you he did, just not physically. It was you who did the physical breaking.

You didn’t mean to kill him, nor anyone else outside the arena, but his grotesque hands roaming your body triggered something deep inside you; a primal instinct you first felt in the arena. It was kill or be killed.

You tried to push through it. Snow had warned you what would happen to your family if you didn’t comply. But laying there being completely violated by this capital man broke the only pieces of you that had survived the arena. Your mind had convinced itself that you were out of options.

The man’s avox had phoned the police when she heard him scream, but they weren’t fast enough. He was so engrossed in his actions that he didn’t notice the way your eyes turned cold, or the way you stopped protesting.

Less than two minutes later, he was dead. You still can’t shake the feeling of his eyeballs under your nails, or the sound he made as you crushed his esophagus. The worst part was having to unattach yourself from him when the ordeal was over. You didn’t even protest when the police entered. They sedated you and carried you off, away from the scene of your crime.

Did you mean to kill him? No.

Do you regret it? Absolutely not.

The only thing you regret is coming out of that arena alive; but what’s done is done and there’s no going back.

Your prep team won’t go anywhere near you for the parade, which is quite the dilemma. How the hell were you supposed to get ready? You’re surprised a stylist designed something for you at all, or that they’re even letting you participate for that matter.

Apparently, your stylist didn’t design the outfit. He said that his mentor, Tigress, wanted to design something for you specifically but she is banned from the games so he volunteered to bring her design to you. He’s the first person in the capital who doesn’t seem terrified to be in your presence, but the peacekeepers still won’t let him near.

You’re forced to dress in front of the peacekeepers. They uncuff you at least but it’s still uncomfortable. You would strangle them all right now but unfortunately there would be consequences.

Snow paid you a visit last night. He told you exactly what would happen if you went “feral” before the games.

“We wouldn’t want Mr. Odair’s pedestal to malfunction while he was standing on it, would we?” he stated. “Or for Mrs. Flanagan to come down with a horrible illness. That would be quite unfortunate.”

You had to do everything possible to keep yourself under control, but even that could only help so much. The rage you felt inside was growing and it wasn’t calming down anytime soon.

“Why isn’t it ready yet?” the shrill voice of Linessa calls to the peacekeepers outside of your room.

“No prep team would touch her,” they tell her. “The tribute is getting herself dressed.”

“Move,” Finnick states as he pushes past the group to enter your room. You’re mostly clothed but are having issues with zipping up the back of your gown.

It’s a beautiful blue gown that hugs your skin before flaring out just below your hips. The stylist explained it as, “The image of a silent siren. A deeply misunderstood mythological creature of the ocean.”

Finnick slowly approaches, making sure you can see his hands.

“Can I help get you ready?” he asks. “We need to be out there soon.”

You nod and turn so he can zip up your dress. The feeling of his hands on your back causes you to tense up but you grit your teeth and remind yourself it’s just Finnick.

Practically grinding your teeth dull, you let Finnick do a simple makeup look on you to match your outfit. You wish you could give him an outfit instead of a net but neither you nor Mags have a say in the matter. You especially don’t.

Finnick is especially careful not to touch the scar that runs down the side of your face. You got it during your games and the capital doctors refused to polish it off after you killed one with a scalpel for taking your temperature. You wish you had the temperament to let him cover it up with the makeup but you know it would set you off.

When he’s done, the peacekeepers come and recuff your wrists but leave your feet free so you don’t trip in the dress.

“She doesn’t need those,” Finnick tells them.

“I’m sorry Mr. Odair but these are direct orders from Snow,” they state.

“Will you remove them before the parade?” he asks.

“No,” they state. Mags whispers something to Finnick and he nods in understanding before approaching you slowly.

“Hey,” he calmly states. “I need to go talk to some people before the parade. Stay with Mags and I’ll come get you before we start.” You nod and he leaves.

The peacekeepers force you and Mags out to where the chariots are, but make you stay along the edge of the stables where they can keep an eye on you. They wouldn’t want any of the “excitement” to start before the games begin.

You can see Finnick talking to Katniss, last year’s victor. You don’t really know any of the other victors besides Finnick and Mags. They know all about you, of course, but none of them care enough to get to know you. The only one who has ever spoken to you (over the phone of course) is Johanna Mason of District 7. She’s pretty close with Finnick and they talk all the time. You would be jealous if Finnick didn’t practically live at your place and spend all his time with you. Plus Johanna hates people.

“Hey feisty!” you hear Johanna call as she approaches you. Finnick has shown you pictures of her but outside of that and watching her games you had only ever heard her voice. The peacekeepers move to block her but one glare from her sends them away. “How’s life outside of your cell?”

You give her a thumbs down and she laughs in response, catching the attention of the other tributes.

“Well I give it double thumbs down,” she states.

“Johanna!” you hear a male yell. “Get your ass over here.”

“Ugh Blight’s calling,” Johanna groans. “See ya later feisty!”

You think you’re done socializing for today when you’re approached by a young blond boy. He doesn’t protest when the peacekeepers keep him five feet away.

“Hi y/n,” he states. “I’m Peeta. I don’t think we’ve met yet.”

You give him a blank stare as you study him. Something about you feels like he’s harmless, but you can’t be too sure.

“Ah Melark,” Gloss booms as he approaches the boy. “Don’t take it personal. Feral doesn’t talk.”

It’s clear these two haven’t met before as Peeta looks a bit scared of the career. You’d met Gloss once before your games as he was your allies’ mentor, but you haven’t spoken in years. Him and Finnick aren’t close.

“Oh, uh I’m sorry,” Peeta stutters. He glances over his shoulder to see Finnick flirting with Katniss. “Uh nice to meet you I guess.”

Peeta looks harmless, but looks can be deceiving. Katniss, on the other hand, looks like trouble.

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[minhosbitterriver]

hi green !! i’ve been a quiet enjoyer of your works and i finally grew the courage to make a request i hope that’s okay !!

what would puppy love with lee know look like ? if it’s with a male reader, that would be great ! thank you !

PUPPY LOVE— lee minho

스트레이 키즈 ( 리노 ) x male reader genre. fluff warnings. it's gay, the gays get in trouble at school therefore minho gets in trouble at home, gay, more gay, they're in high school and in love and it's them against the world, also it’s mostly written from minho’s pov rating. everyone word count. 1.0k summary. in which high school lee minho is so madly in love with you that he's willing to follow you anywhere, anytime.

💭 GUIDELINES ‣ LIBRARY ‣ TAGLIST & ANONS ‣ IN PROGRESS ‣ REQUEST LIST ‣ PINNED

Puppy-Love-Minho who would wake up before the sun was even up so he could be the first to see you when you arrived at school, falling asleep on his desk while he waited. He would always look away sheepishly when he would wake up to find you watching him with twinkling eyes, laughing lightly. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who would follow you into the faculty break room with his heart beating in his throat while you rummaged around to see if you could find anything of interest. He would’ve never done something that could earn him a scolding, though because you suggested it, he agreed to be the lookout while simultaneously swooning at the goofy smirk you wore while you found love notes from teachers by the coffee machine. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who, in the terrifying realization that the well-known strict math teacher was making her way into the faculty break room, grabbed you by the wrist without a word before bolting out of the room while you stumbled and tripped behind him. The shouting from your teacher being drowned out by the crazed giggles coming out of both of your mouths as you continued to run as fast as you possibly could while trying not to fixate too much on the fact that he was still holding your wrist. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who would pull you into one of the stalls of the boys’ bathroom to finally rest from running, having you stand on the toilet together though still huddled — your legs becoming a tangled mess as you both panted and laughed breathlessly, trying to calm the loud drums of your hearts. It was a matter of seconds before you both really noticed how close together your faces were, your lips a hair’s width away from touching his. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who would turn away shyly, hoping to whatever gods existed that you couldn’t hear the way his heart beat erratically at such a scene. His ears burned red as the blood crept up and pooled into his cheeks all the while his hands trembled. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who almost passed out when the principal of your school suddenly opens the bathroom stall in which you’d both hidden in, his face contorted in anger as he pointed his finger towards the exit. Although Minho could only imagine the amount of trouble he’ll find himself in at home, he couldn’t help but be guilt-free at the sight of your amused grin that made you look as though you thought this whole ordeal was funny. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who received the scolding of his life the second he stepped foot inside of his home, very much as he’d predicted, and got sent to his room without the privilege of leaving unless it was to use the bathroom. Even still, he replayed the morning’s events in his head with a lovesick smile on his face. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who almost yells out when he hears a rock hit his bedroom window, finding you standing down in his backyard with a stupid grin on your face when he finally grows the courage to peer outside. His heart doing somersaults in his chest at the sight, at the thought of his parents finding you standing there as well — at the thrill of it all.  

Puppy-Love-Minho who can almost envision his own funeral as he manages to sneak past his parents’ bedroom to meet you outside, body tensed as he prays once again that nothing goes wrong. He can only breathe once you both make it outside the property, walking down the neighborhood — only then did he finally ask you what the hell you thought you were doing. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who huffs as you laugh at his anxiety, shoving you lightly though he had to look away to hide the smile that threatened to slip up. He listens intently as you apologize sincerely for getting him in trouble, and feels as though he might pass out as you pull out a kitty keychain out of your pocket and offer it to him. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who forgets to breathe when you step forward as you hand him his gift, keeping your eyes on his as you do so. Although he panicked at the thought of anyone in his neighborhood seeing him kiss another boy, he couldn’t pull away for the small hope that you would press your lips against his. 

Puppy-Love-Minho whose breath absolutely leaves him when he notices you slowly leaning in, your eyes on his trembling lips.

Puppy-Love-Minho who sees your short hesitation as you look up into his eyes, trying to read him, and closes the small gap between your lips in a small burst of adrenaline. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who could almost hear imaginary fireworks exploding in the background as his blood pumped through his veins at record speed. His hands find your waist so that he could pull himself closer to you in order to deepen the kiss, feeling himself becoming bolder by the second. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who feels your teeth against his lips as you laugh softly, somehow triggering shame to creep up as the weight of both of your actions finally settles.

Puppy-Love-Minho who immediately softens when you grab ahold of both of his hands and tell him that it was okay, that you didn’t mean to laugh — you just couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that he felt the same way about you. He laughs at you, and tells you he’s the one who should be thanking his lucky stars for reciprocating his feelings. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who doesn’t want to let you go when you try to say goodbye; though he eventually does with a sigh when you promise you’d see him tomorrow at school.

Puppy-Love-Minho who doesn’t move from his spot until you were completely out of sight, waving at you every single time you turned to see if he’d gone back inside. Even after you were long gone he remained there, barely able to process the amount of thrill the last twenty four hours had brought to him. 

Puppy-Love-Minho who almost throws up when he realizes he needs to sneak back inside without his parents noticing, and he prays to his lucky stars that he can avoid getting caught. 

posted: 06 • 29 • 2024

💬 a note from green;

Thank you so much for this request! It was so much fun to write honestly but that might be because i accidentally got stoned out of my mind, and I really hope you enjoy this! Also, thank you for enjoying my other works, it really makes my day when I hear people tell me that. Hope to hear from you again!

( 🏷️ ) permanent taglist: @agi-ppangx

[kiki-sleeps]

Dark!Jack Frost x reader

A/N: a one-shot from one of my many delusions of the night. Might become more, who knows. Always liked the idea of an evil jack frost, hope you enjoy!

The Guardian's Investigative Journal

Entry #1

Middle of February, 20XX - New Headquarters

Whoever said the winter cold was beautiful was lying. Definitely and terribly so. 'Oh your breath creates pretty shapes and sparkles!' Yeah… what a load of bullshit. 

Winter is awful, at least for me. Winter is the annoying feeling of stiff muscles, of runny noses, of numb fingers. Winter is crazy. Winter is mad. Winter has black hair, dark as coal, and yellow eyes, not warm like honey, no, but chilling, like the ones of a predator.

Winter has a name, and as much as the whole of our system wished it wasn't alive, it's Jack Frost. 

He’s infuriating, and rotten, and whatever synonym you may add to describe him. 

The day he turned his back on the Guardians, was the day I was chosen. It took a while for the entire ordeal to settle in their minds, actually. At first, and reasonably so, they thought it was a joke. A prank, one of those that made him disappear for days and suddenly pop up back again with a weird smile that promised trouble. But it wasn't. The blizzard made of cold and sharp black sand came out and wiped the North Pole from existence, just one random day. One would think his love of irony would have made him choose a special day, like Christmas or such, but instead he picked a normal, ordinary, unassuming day. And it was twice as terrifying. What was left? Dust and coal. Coventrized so hard they thought it was my fault, they thought I burned it down accidentally, with a sneeze. Can you imagine that? Not controlling your power enough that you wipe out not just a building, but the huge headquarters. I laughed, then. After all, not a single one of us had realized the magnitude of what had truly happened. 

His voice came then. It was the first time I actually heard anything that came from him and not from one of the others’ stories, and it turned the status quo upside down. Just a wicked voice, saying how he was tired of doing this and that, that the humans were never grateful for what he brought, and a bunch of things that I didn't really hear. The one who took it the hardest was Bunnymund. It had taken him the longest to really open up apparently, and maybe that's one of the reasons he doesn't talk much to me now. Bruised trust. I’m not taking it personally, I'm the newbie, after all. I was mostly confused, rather than betrayed. I'd never met him at that point and I genuinely couldn't put together how somebody who was supposed to be an ally, and a quite good one at that, just went bonkers on a casual Wednesday. This whole idea I had of him didn't match, so I assumed something had happened to him to do a full 180.

So, as soon as the boring ‘new Guardian’ training ended, I started my investigation. Which is why I was in the middle of nowhere multiple times, in a white wasteland of twisted and dry trees that repeated itself no matter the continent. It was eerily uncomfortable, and the glistening atmosphere I used to admire from afar in my time as a wandering spirit was gone. Then, the snow almost looked like ashes.

I can make the black ones that come from a bright fire, an ode to life that burns with vitality. Those just looked like a past disaster. When a volcano erupts, it's a spectacular view, and nowadays the show is basically without consequences. But I remember. When the grey cloud wraps everything after, and the only sound is the reverbing echo of coughs from the smoke. A cinereum snow that covers what is gone. Such was the feeling that made my skin get goosebumps, and not from the temperature. And yet, exactly as all the places I checked in this season, the overbearing sensation of just being watched, was there. It felt like Pompeii over again, but this time the footprints were mine instead of ancient romans'.

I couldn't have possibly known he was truly there. I mean, there's a million lakes in the world and most of them are in North America, so really, how was I supposed to know he fancied this one particular. But I guess bad luck comes with Terms and Conditions of being a Guardian.

I think he actually wanted to make himself known, then. Because honestly, a powerful spirit who flies on the daily and hides constantly in the shadows, all of a sudden makes an accidental noise? Be for real. When I heard the cracking sound of a twig I thought it was an animal. ‘Not very smart warrior’ of me, as in North's words. It took him a couple of more tries to actually make me turn around, and even then I had to squint to even see the outline of something. But what really made me breathless for a second, were the eyes. He was perched up on a branch, piercing me with a vibrant gold that promised not fun, but deceit. In what I'd say was not my brightest moment, I thought he looked like an owl. The kind that want to look threatening but only manage to sit awkwardly in a standoffish stance. I almost snorted, but thank god for Sandy’s lessons of calm and meditation.

And then he spoke. And I swear on the Man in the Moon, I've never heard a more irksome voice. It was grating on my nerves, and that was the least of his attitude that made me want to sucker punch him into oblivion. I thought it was bad when I'd heard it on the catastrophe day, but in person? It was ten times worse. But what incensed me the most was that he actually had the fucking audacity to call me a pet name.

“And what's a sparkly spirit like you doing here, doll?”

“None of your business.”

Ok, I lied. Technically it is his business,  since I'm investigating his recent fall to madness, but he definitely doesn't need to know that.

Slowly, he walked into the light, and how I wish my traitorous mind did not think he was cute. He had a black hoodie, presumably for fitting into the whole ‘evil’ package, and brown pants that fell around his calves, tied by leather strings. Seriously, what is it with villains and their obsession with this color? As if somebody couldn't act badly if they're dressed in, I don't know, pink. But I'm losing the focus here.

While his eyes were what had struck my attention before, now his cheekbones were doing the trick. They were high and connected by a lean nose and immersed in pale skin, the sickly withering Victorian child kind. The smirk –that I immediately wanted to wipe from his face just out of spite– was stretched across perfectly chiselled lips and a jawline carved in the finest marble. Now that's what I call unfair. Choosing somebody like that to be on the bad side? Foul, I tell you. 

And apparently my answer only amused him further, because he gave a dry chuckle and sauntered around, with a cocky stride perfectly in line with his overall insufferableness. 

I decided to get to the point, “What do you want, Frost?”

“Surprised you know my name, doll.”, he grinned, and the urge to smack him had never been stronger.

“Ah yes, who would know the name of only the biggest traitor in the history of humanity.”

I think it was obvious it was meant to be sarcastic, but he still rolled his eyes and then put on a ridiculous diva act, faking a gasp and placing a hand over his chest.

“Traitor? Ouch, doll, that hurts my poor feelings!”

I could not have been less impressed than I already was.

“Are you sure you have those? Wasn't aware.”

He didn't deign me with an answer, the buffoon, and simply circled around me, humming in confidence. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of even a slight twitch of my expression, so I side eyed him as he moved agonizingly slow around me, but never stopping in my blind spot in what I believe was a puke-inducing superiority assertion. When he stopped, he was right in front of my glare, mirrored by a devilish grin of his.

I grit my teeth, “You never answered my question.” 

In turn, I got a provoking fake ‘deep-in-thought’ performance, complete with a finger under his chin. “Mmm, I don't know, why would I do that?” He started strolling again, “It's not like you have any way of making me tell you anything, and on the other side we have the magnificent me, who can have anything he desires.”

Jesus, did he really say that? Could his ego be any more inflated? Nevertheless, he droned on, “I suppose I could make it an act of charity, yes? I'm sure that would be more appropriate considering the enormous amount of difference in our strength.”

And now I was utterly disgusted, forget the poker face. 

“What did Pitch inject you with, condensed delusion?”

He laughed, and as quickly as he had gloated a second before, he flipped another switch, leaning dangerously in my safe space, and licked his lips.

“Feisty, I like that.” “Ew.”

I couldn't stop myself from saying it. It was a completely involuntary reaction, and an adequate one, after hearing that corny sentence. What he thought about my genuine revulsion at the thought? Still funny, apparently, because, and thank god, he cracked up at my reaction and backed away.

After this, I really had enough. It was my first time meeting him and I couldn't have wanted him more dead. By my fire, possibly. Hence why, after giving an eye roll for good measure, I started walking away. Or at least, that was the plan, but the switch flipped again, and it was looking at a shark that had just smelled fresh blood, a piercing stare almost freezing me in place. It was menacing.

He gripped my wrist hard, and the icy sensation of his skin made me jump so much I had to physically repress a shiver. 

“I'm not done yet.”

I just stared back, and for what felt like hours, the only movement was the snow still wistfully falling around us. It was like a stalemate, of sorts. From the bits and pieces I had gathered here and there, he was arrogant, sure, and full of himself, but not stupid. He hadn't gone on a full offense because he doesn't know my full capability, and if it goes how I want in the future, he won't know. This has two possible reasons: I'm the newest Guardian and I haven't really done anything after becoming one, and whatever information he has got from the time before isn't sufficient, since I mostly laid low. In conclusion, I had the advantage. His powers might have been different from when he was one of us, but they still make up a good portion of his attack range, which I knew and had prepared to fight against – courtesy of the memories from the Tooth Fairy archive.

So, to maintain my upper hand, I heated it up. In the span of milliseconds the skin that stood firmly in his grasp became so scalding he had no choice but to let it go. It seems he is even more sensitive than I thought - for future reference - because he jumped back with a hiss, looking like a scorned cat, and from what I could see I actually had left a quite significant burn mark on his palm. I couldn't help my eyes widening in surprise, and he must've seen that because he quickly regained his composure, as much as he could, and smirked. If he wanted to go for a full round, then so be it. I was perfectly ready. Only for him to change his mind as fast as he had done before and vanish in a coat of black. What a coward. And yet, he still wouldn't let me have the last word, so in the silence of the woods, his voice echoed:

“Wow, you got some fire in you, HA!”

It seems I was wrong about him. He's a coward AND a clown.

[nixie-writes-aot]

Blood Yearned, Blood Earned

Warnings: nsfw, minors dni, blood play, afab reader (fem terms used), mentions of violence/murder, praise, degradation, ownership, possessive behavior, foreplay

Characters: Levi Ackerman

Prompt: No Name Band/Modern AU // Vampire AU

Author's Note: I have not written vamps in a long, long time. First reader insert of this whole damn week, hell yeah. Where did my brand go?

Levi was a simple man, all things considered. He was born and raised in the Underground where a few warm bodies being drained wasn't a call for concern, they were either dead already or low enough in value that no one really saw their deaths as some tragedy. Well, raised was under some debate. More so, Levi raised himself. Regardless, all he strove for was to keep himself fed and high enough in the food chain that there wasn't really anyone who could go against him. Now, coming from the Underground he had expected the same apprehension and common awareness everyone had down there. That wasn't the case, however. It was one of the few things the Underground was ahead of the majority with.

There were certainly some misconceptions that Levi appreciated and encouraged among those within the Scouts. The whole "vampires burn in the daylight" ordeal was one of those. It was simply easier to keep his dirty little secret if those who might become suspicious thought he would burn to a crisp the second the sun shone. Of course, there were other things that Levi couldn't account for. One of those was you.

You were troublesome, to say the least. Normally, Levi had no trouble resisting his urges to sink his fangs into the throat of those who might be missed no matter how pretty they might be but you were different. If Levi was a monster of the night, he was sure you were the day's pretty little priestess. Sometimes, Levi just wanted to grab you by the throat and rip it out. However, that would be far too messy. Too dirty. Beyond that, it meant he could no longer be around you.

For the first time in a long time, Levi found himself properly hunting his "prey" in the methods passed down to him by Kenny the Ripper. More than anything, he found himself entranced. So, when he did finally get you in his grasps? Levi never wanted to let you go.

Levi pressed you against the wall, pressing his lips against your neck. He could hear your blood pumping within your veins, he could feel your pulse against his lips. "I want you." Levi growled, pressing his thigh between your legs as you whimpered, "I want your blood, all over my lips. Can I have that? Will you give me your blood?"

You whined, feeling your cunt clench around nothing. You had known since day one that something was off about Levi and when you learned his strength was tied to his status as one of the monsters the Capital kept a secret in the dark? Part of you was terrified but part of you was also unbelievably turned on by the very idea. "P-please." You whispered, feeling the sharp point of Levi's fangs press against that vein in your neck.

"I would love to start here except the carotid is an artery, you'd bleed out in seconds." Levi groaned, his cock hard and throbbing in his pants, "So," he began, pulling his face away from your throat and grabbing your hand, "I'll start here. I can't just kill my pretty little meal, can I?" You shook your head, stifling a low groan as he sunk his fangs into your wrist. The feeling was immaculate.

Levi knew you would taste good but not nearly as good as you did, piercing your skin and letting the blood drip and gush into his mouth. He moaned at the taste, wanting to fuck you on his cock at the taste. Levi knew he would. He wanted to claim you in every possible way, really. So, Levi trailed his hand downwards and into your pants. He pulled away from your wrist, "You taste fucking good. Lets see how sweeter your blood will taste when I'm fucking your pathetic cunt."

Taglist: @leviweek2023 @yourthoughtsjim

[kayforpay]

oh man. would love to see ur take on Karkat arguing that Gamzee should even be allowed to _live_ on Earth C....

It was always awkward to have to ask someone to speak on your behalf. If not for Karkat's wary first approach, Gamzee simply wouldn't have asked at all; what he had done, even if it wasn't entirely under his control, wasn't something he would forgive.

He had liked Nepeta, appreciated Terezi, and tolerated Equius. He wouldn't forgive someone else, even if they didn't have foggy memories of monsters that sounded like his friends, that looked like eels moving under their skin, and the desperate need to eradicate them.

But Karkat was, like usual, better than he was.

Waking up in control of his body was a shock. He had spent days curled on his side, struggling to keep even liquids down and in more pain than he could recognize. How had he detoxed without feeling it? Every nerve in his body was burning for a wipe, and he didn't even try to contact anyone. The fact that he had come through the end of the game wasn't even on his mind until he realized that the hive he was in had windows that didn't have automated shades.

Before that, he had hoped that the entire ordeal was a dayterror.

Then, almost immediately after he was aware enough to realize what had happened, Karkat let himself in. Reddish tears streamed down his face as he collapsed next to Gamzee's pathetic pile, his voice hushed as he gripped Gamzee's horns almost painfully to force him to look up.

"You're alive. Thank the stupid fucking human god. You're alive." He had pressed his forehead to Gamzee's own, had cupped his cheeks, and shook with emotion. "I'm so glad. I was so worried, Gamzee. I was so scared, I thought you were-- I thought you didn't win with us."

Gamzee had put a hand on Karkat's cheek (no way he could have known how warm his skin was in real life, how different it would feel when his body was his own again, how soft) and finally let himself cry.

The next month, since the humans insisted on taking over calendars and the world was more human than troll, consisted of everyone getting their footing again. The ones who had reached god-tier were still there, but he didn't actually know if that counted him or not. He wasn't privy to what he did, in the long gaps when Aranea had smothered his consciousness under a sickening blue blanket. For all he knew, he was faking the entire time, just for her amusement.

After that, once everyone found each other again, since the game had seen fit to mix sessions and revive everyone for, presumably, some kind of fucked-up bonus prize, Gamzee was immediately on the outside. He didn't blame them. Nepeta and Terezi were terrified of him; Equius was disgusted with both Gamzee and himself, and seemed more ashamed than anything when their eyes would meet.

Karkat told him, clearly, that they would start over. That he needed to "get to know the real Gamzee", that they couldn't just step back in now that they weren't wrigglers. It made sense, and Gamzee did his best not to act like they were close (though it was hard, when Karkat would come over and end up in his lap to cuddle). Even so, Karkat tried to defend him.

"The problem wasn't Gamzee. The problem didn't-- He didn't fucking kill anyone until the mind control got to him. Before that, he wasn't hurting people." He said, standing up from the awkward meal they were sharing with Kanaya, her human wife, Vriska and Terezi. "If we're going to punish him for having been mind controlled, are we gonna punish Terezi? Or Vriska, for doing it?"

Gamzee looked at the plate in front of him and swallowed. It was silent, awkward, but Kanaya had brought up the fact that she couldn't blame anyone for being uncomfortable. "Kar, you don't gotta do this. It's okay." He tried to speak more softly than before, not just for privacy, but because he made people flinch when he was too loud.

"It isn't! It isn't fucking okay, Gamzee! I-- I know you! I knew you, and you wouldn't do that. You won't do it again." He turned his entire body, and tried to hold back more tears as he continued. "It isn't fair for just you to be punished. I fucked up too. We all fucked up. Kanaya has a fucking hole in her stomach, Sollux is blind... I don't know what to do about the Beforans."

He moved slowly, putting a hand on Karkat's shoulder. "I'll be okay, bro. I'm okay. I'm just so motherfuckin' happy I got to be in my body again at all." It was a lie, but he was better at lying than Karkat was, and he didn't think anyone noticed.

"I won't." Karkat said, glancing to the table and then back. "I won't be okay without you. I can't do it again. You're not allowed to go before me, so don't be fucking stupid and try it. I'm the mutant, I die first."

Carefully, Kanaya cleared her throat. "I... Don't want to interrupt. But I don't think anything can be decided immediately. Maybe some ground rules?" Her eyes settled on Rose, apparently looking for support.

"I think that would help." Rose said, much more cocksure than most of the humans Gamzee had seen. She seemed like she meant it. "As long as Gamzee can remain sober, and can meet with... Someone, maybe Vriska?" She met Vriska's eyes, and they both nodded. "To make sure that you do, and that Aranea isn't influencing you again, well... That's somewhere to start, isn't it?"

He nodded, and Terezi fake-coughed, loud enough to make Karkat jump. "I mean, I think that's fine. Like Karkat said, we all fucked up. It isn't like we can just let one weird fucking clown go around but not the other. And Gamzee isn't trying to sew anything shut." She cackled, but Gamzee remembered, though it was brief, how she sounded when sincere, and it seemed to match.

Nothing set in stone. Someone probing his mind all the time, but not controlling it, at least. And the chance to be alive, in control, again. That wasn't nothing. That was more than he let himself hope for.

[pjunicornart]

SAW UR POST WAS IMMEDIATELY INTERESTED :3!!1!1!2!211

can u feed us lazy four info, like how did they meet? fav hangout spot? some random stuff they do together? stuff like that :3 if youve had time to develop them??? considering u probs plan on writing lazy wilro.....

SO. 👏

All of the Lazy Four exist within the same universe. So we have Wilbur, who lives in the Robinson estate on the outskirts of the city. Penny is a pop star originally from Chicago, but now lives in the city due to the rich estates and luxuries. Pop star life, y'know. Violet is a skater girl who goes to Wilbur's school. It should be noted that within Lazy Days, the Parrs DO NOT have superpowers. But, I did give them professions/hobbies which elude to them (Mrs. Incredible is a silk ribbon dancer, for example. Keep this in mind). Last but not least, Hiro is a third generation Japanese-American immigrant living in his grandfather's cafe with his older brother and aunt.

How they met: Well, Wilbur, Violet, and Hiro all go to the same school. So they met there. As for how they met Penny, there is a story there. Because of who Cornelius is, he has quite a lot of connections and "high profile clients" as his PA would put it. A couple of years ago, he was sent on a lengthy business trip. He had to bring Leo (Wilbur's baby brother) along since he was only a year old at the time. Wilbur was 13 about to be 14 when this happened. Wilbur tagged along because Neil promised they'd do something awesome for his birthday, and he didn't let work get in the way of that. This was a trip to Norway, so they figured they could do birthday festivities there as a special occasion. But first, Neil had to meet up with his client, who just so happened to be Penny's father, her manager. While the two men were discussing boring business stuff, Penny and Wilbur were able to hang out. At the end of the ordeal, they had exchanged numbers and kept in touch. Back home, Wilbur (over video calls) introduced Vi and Hiro to Penny, and the rest is history.

Some stuff they do: They mostly hang around the Robinson estate, because the family is fun. Well, also the hot tub and theater. Individually, Violet hangs out at the skate park, Wilbur in the home library, Penny in her garden, and Hiro wherever food is, tbh. Boy can't get enough of sweets. Not related to the kiddos, but Neil became good friends with Helen because they were in the same silk ribbon dancing class. Vi thinks her mother is better/more flexible, but Wilbur laughs in his father being a gymnast, yogi, pole dancer, and silk ribbon dancer. Take that Vi!

Miscellaneous points: - Wilbur is always reading something. Sometimes, he just can't shut up about the newest book he's reading. - Tadashi is still alive! Because I like him. The fire still happened, so Tadashi does have severe burns he has to treat every day. Luckily, Wilbur's father knows a thing or two about treating burns. - Sometimes Violet secretly wishes her siblings could be like Wilbur's. Quiet and polite! - It's pretty well known that Leo only likes to be held by/in the presence of Neil. However, he tolerates Penny and Wilbur. Probably because they were there when he was away from Neil for the meeting. - All of them are babies when it comes to horror. Except for Violet. She loves horror, especially psychological horror akin to Cooking Companions or That's Not My Neighbor. - Penny has three dogs. Bolt (duh), Lightning, and Shock. - If we're talking about Wilro, Wilbur calls Hiro "mio dolce." Half of Wilbur's family is Italian, so he knows some words/phrases. "Mio dolce" is a pet name. It can mean "my sweet", "my love", or "my cake." - Whenever all four of them are in Hiro's aunt's cafe, they ask for the day old donuts. - Violet can't whistle or snap her fingers. - Hiro is only slightly terrified of Wilbur's little sister's (Mazie) pet snake. Its name is Bananaconda. - Yes, Hiro knows how to bake! Instead of being a prodigy in inventing like his bro, he's an advanced baker with very intricate techniques. All figured out by the time he was nine. - Penny became a pop star when she was twelve. She mostly did kid's TV beforehand, before she got her career in music. Think... Miley Cyrus and Ariana Grande, just without the gross tongue stuff and home wrecking. - Violet does name her skateboards. Her favorite is Pico. - Wilbur is canonically bisexual, Hiro is pansexual, Penny is a straight ally, and Violet is a demigirl lesbian. - Bit of a sad point here, but Wilbur did struggle with an eating disorder (anorexia) when he was 12 and 13. Unfortunately, he inherited his father's body dysmorphia.

In regards to the Wilro fic... It will be inspired by the one Wilro image I did. It will also be pure fluff, since these are teenagers and I'm not about that gross shit! =D They'll be in the Robinson estate, and I'm unsure if we'll see any more Robinsons. We'll see. I gotta do some planning.

[fifteenminutes-if]

RO reactions to overhearing MC gushing about them to a good friend of theirs? Like they're saying how awesome the RO is, how much they love the RO, they feel like the RO is their soulmate, etc etc

we'll assume this is at a stage in mc's relationship with all the ROs where it's been a few months after first meeting/reconnecting (or in val's case, a few months after reconnecting and trying to either avoid you or aggravate you into starting world war three)

slightly nsfwish? discussions of sexual themes for maddox

maddox: flabbergasted and dismayed. there'd be a little ember of hope simmering beneath the consternation, but the dominant feeling would be fear. they're not stable and they know it. their ex-partner knew it and the aftermath of that relationship left maddox in shambles. and people always want something from maddox so the concept of loving them for them and not what they can do for someone is incomprehensible. they'd be very withdrawn and a little insecure after hearing this. they'd spiral down rabbit holes of how they could fuck up their relationship with you and would eventually push for "breaking up" your PR relationship. carrying on something fake with you would not tickle their fancy.

(fwb route): if this is a few months in, they'd be relieved lol because they would've started off this relationship with the intent to keep it casual but would've fell for you gradually. then kept it bottled up and attributed it to the intimacy afforded during sex (something they don't find in other corners of his life). they'd still experience the uncertainty and fear described above, but would feel a bit more secure because your pillow talks and morning-afters would've become a natural part of their life and they'd feel more connected to you. not saying sex is necessary for them to feel connected to their partner, but the circumstances led to them getting to know you on a more personal level than a more friendly/hostile/indifferent route.

mateo (past ex route): precious baby boy. would be on cloud nine for the rest of the day and would get an earful from his family for it. it would feel like kismet to him—something fated, something profound. he let you go and you found your way back to each other. would try to give you space to come to him with the confession yourself but wouldn't be able to stop himself from reacting to your voice and your touch (even more than usual). i.e., if you were to casually brush past him, he'd stop breathing. you'd be a near constant in his dreams. and it would really only be a matter of time until he blurts something out, but until then he'd be content with admiring you from afar. he'd take you in any form you can give.

(past friends/acquaintance route): not the most shocked tbh. he's quite perceptive and had sensed a shift in the way you acted around him ever since you reconnected. doesn't mean he's not extremely pleased though. similar to exes route, would want you to come to him with a confession but would drop subtle hints to nudge you there. would be a smug little bastard.

carmen: immediately feels tears gathering at the back of her eyes. you've gotten to know her beyond the persona she wants the world to see and you love her in the face of all her mistakes and flaws? the terrifying ordeal of being known lol not something she's had to deal with for much of her life because people are content to love the ideal version of herself (aka the perfect pop star). i think having just one person extend love to the ugly, suppressed parts of her without inhibition would literally break her. carmen would be over the moon and bursting at the seams to flag you down and do a grand confession. it would be messy and she'd be sobbing half the time, but she'd be determined to make it happen. she's more in tune with her feelings than some of the other clowns in this circus and once she has MC, she's not letting go.

robin: first instinct is to turn right around and leave. robin prides themselves on being a morally upstanding person (because they're annoying like that) and eavesdropping on someone—especially someone they're making the focal point of [REDACTED]—goes against their code of ethics. but, when they catch their name they can't help but listen in out of pure curiosity. hearing you gush over them would rekindle something in them they buried long ago, but there'd be so many (so. many.) alarm bells ringing in their head. they'd eventually rip themselves away from the scene and lie awake at night, overturning every word you had said in their mind. and yes, it would be branded into their brain forever. they'd eventually come to a decision to not pursue anything, and from then on they'd make an even greater effort to be as professional as possible. because you're an unknown and they know they'd have to become an amnesiac in order to resist your pull.

val (ex friends route): crushed beyond belief. they always believed you were too good for them—their hands can be gentle but more often than not they're folded into fists. and hearing you confess your love for them despite everything they put you through? val would basically skip town thinking they're doing you both a favour. they'd torture themselves with what ifs and fight the violent urge to show up at your apartment door and ask why. i guess this is where i reveal that val had a massive crush on you back when your band was together in both routes lol they just suppressed it for years. and the possibility that you could've loved them when things were good—when they had a chance with you, when they would've stayed if you asked—would keep them up at night.

(ex rivals (?) route): oh, they'd be so mad. villainizing you by thinking of you as a competitor is how they hold onto their anger and frustration against you. you being in love with them goes against the very fabric of your relationship. they'd be even more hostile than usual, going out of their way to provoke you into arguments while secretly hoping they can tease out an impassioned confession straight from your mouth. they wouldn't know what to do beyond that point if you were to confess though. the occasional stray thought of kissing you senseless (if your MC likes that kind of intimacy) runs through their mind, but they quash that line of thinking real quick.

[blitany]

Joel and Ellie moments that wrecked me like a firefly hospital: finale edition

the recap intro just made it so clear that the whole story is them - it’s their evolution from strangers to “you’re cargo” to “it’s okay baby girl i got you”

Ellie is clearly still going through it and Joel knows (”you’re extra quiet today” when Ellie has never been quiet before) and he’s trying so hard to get her to smile!! The Chef Boyardee, the Boggle, asking her for silly puns - they’ve had enough time together to have real memories and moments to call back to with each other and he’s using all of it to bring the Ellie he knows back

how Joel asks her to hold the gun for him and trusts her to carry it! they’ve grown so much since we first met them, he knows she has his back and she can handle it and she always does

he’s just being so gentle and fatherly with her - he’s given protective dad energy for a while now but we finally get to see him being nurturing and encouraging and it’s so sweet because she needs it now more than ever

he wants to teach her guitar because he thinks she’d be good at it i - 

Ellie utterly dropping the ladder and ignoring what Joel asked her to do in such a classic father/daughter moment but Joel letting her get away with doing that and running off because he’s just happy to see her excited about something again

THE GIRAFFE SCENE!!! how she’s so excited to show him this beautiful view she spotted and this fascinating creature and she wants to share it with him?? everything about this scene is magical but can we talk about the way Joel looks at Ellie with just all of the love in the world? just gazing at her smiling, watching his daughter feed the giraffe and giggle and in that moment he knows he’d do anything for this girl

which is precisely what prompts him to suggest they just “go home.” back to Tommy’s place in Wyoming. he’s seeing all the beauty there, how new things have grown in the place of such devastation and his life is blossoming again, too. growing new connections and new hope. this family of giraffes is playing together on the horizon. why not just save the beautiful things? why not just let themselves enjoy it? he’s already seen her sacrifice so much - why not just let his little girl rest? doesn’t she deserve that? doesn’t he deserve that?

“i’ll follow you anywhere you go.” I’LL FOLLOW YOU ANYWHERE YOU GO!!!

there’s so much said without them saying it: i’m not leaving you, i can’t leave you, i just want to keep you safe, i just want to make things better for you, i know you’ve lost people before but you won’t lose me

he’s talking about Sarah with her - all the things that were off limits before they can talk about now, they’re far from strangers and they just want to share these moments with the person they trust and love most in the world,,, if we want the reward of being loved with must subject ourselves to the terrifying ordeal of being known,,,

“it was me. i’m the guy that missed.” and how he says it not because he has to, but because he wants to tell her, he wants her to know, he wants to give her this thing he lived through so she can have a roadmap to surviving what she’s in the middle of 

how Ellie immediately sits down because she knows this is a Serious Talk Moment and she’s ready to listen

“i know why you’re telling me this.” “yeah i reckon you do.” they are so similar it hurts

“it wasn’t time that did it.” 

because it’s everything that isn’t said in this scene, maybe because they don’t know how to say it but both of them know it doesn’t need saying, not between them. how he looks at her - he’s telling her, it was you. how she understands - oh. wow. i didn’t realize. and maybe - you saved me, too. you saved me in ways i didn’t realize i needed saving. 

then how Joel gets choked up because he can see it in her eyes - he can see she knows what he means and maybe even that she feels the same way and that’s the moment that brings him to tears. he’s put his whole heart out there and she just accepts it. without words. 

when Joel immediately tries to lighten the mood because he’s a Dad and he’s grown emotionally but y’know, he’s still Joel - but they have a whole system now and he rates the puns omg 

of course the first thing he’s worried about when he wakes up is Ellie and of course the only thing she’s worried about is Joel

Marlene asks how they did it and “it was all her, she fought so hard to get here.” and she did and he’s so proud of her!! and it wasn’t just a fight to get to the hospital was it? it was a fight to get Joel to trust her, a fight to survive, a fight to find a family for herself and someone who could care about her but she fought so hard for both of them even when he was ready to give up, ready to send her off with Tommy to keep her safe or to make her leave him so his death wouldn’t lead to hers, she fought for them. 

that soft voice when the horror hits him. the brain. oh. oh god. not this. because he just got her and he can’t lose her, he cannot lose her, he will not lose her!!

“you don’t understand.” “i do. i’m the only one who understands.” but does she? you can feel that question in the silence. Joel wondering if Marlene can really understand when she’s only watched from afar? when she doesn’t know the value of a Will Livingston pun or the look on Ellie’s face when she’s feeding a giraffe or how she wants to go to the moon? how can she possibly understand what they’ve been through together, his face seems to ask. how can she know how they’ve saved each other time and time again?

forget Joel with David’s men. i thought that was the Joel that Tommy was afraid of. i was wrong. that wasn’t even a fraction of this Joel - this Joel who never stops once, who doesn’t even give them the chance, who goes after every single person in that building with no remorse, no pause. the Joel who is so terrifyingly focused on one single goal. saving Ellie.

he picks her up so tenderly, he makes sure her arm is covered, and then he carries her just like he carried Sarah. trying to save his baby girl at the end of the world. 

Marlene is trying to save the world, to create a better world - but if it’s a world without Ellie, it’s not a world Joel wants to live in. how could the world ever be better if she’s not in it?

“it’s okay, you’re with me.” the sequel to every look at me, it’s me. always reminding her that he is here and she is safe with him. he won’t let anyone hurt her, not if he can help it. and god help anyone who gets in his way.

he’s trying on their hike to lighten the mood again by talking about Sarah. cementing for him that Ellie is his daughter now, too. he can talk about both of them, and it’s like he’s trying to show her that she’s family to him now with the comparisons. but at the same time, ellie is hesitant. both because of the concern she harbors about the hospital and what really happened - but maybe too because this is just another reminder to her that she’ll never be Sarah. Joel will always be the only father and family she’s had. but he’ll always have had another daughter first - and if Sarah was still around, Ellie would never have Joel.

he’s lying, he’s lying to her and she knows it. that silence - she gave him one last chance to tell her the truth. she doesn’t know what happened, but she sure as hell knows Joel is keeping something from her. and my heart is breaking because all that stable bond they built - suddenly it’s shaky. 

[unadulteratedkr]

# 3, 13 & 27!

Hello Sami, my dear!! <3 <3

#3: What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

I HAVE TO PICK JUST ONE OF MY BABIES?! This is rude of you to do to me 😤

Since I'm having trouble picking just one... I'm calling it an even tie between let it rain, 'cause you and I remain the same (my ofmd bodyswap fic I wrote for @poorlyformed because I said I didn't think I could do it, and my brain went "bet") and Between the Sand and the Stardust (my OFMD Stardust AU with Ed as the fallen star, also written for poorlyformed for the Reverse Big Bang).

I got to do a lot of things that challenged me as a writer in both of those fics, I got to gift them to a dear friend who's got more talent in her pinky finger than I've got in my whole body, and I'm just... I'm really in love with them both? So those are my two faves, but if you ask me again tomorrow, it might be two more different ones 😂

#13: How much planning do you do before writing?

I do a fair amount of outlining before! Most of the time it's a stream-of-consciousness that can be as detailed as actual prose/dialogue, and sometimes it can be as vague as me going "OH MY GOD WHAT IF I---WAIT---NO---NEW IDEA" and then forgetting to write that idea down lmao

I think the two fics I outlined the most were my Jaime/Brienne regency AU (Teach Me the Courage of Stars) because I wanted to have a concrete idea of what I wanted to research and what I wanted to get all hand-wavey about, plus I knew I wanted it to have an epistolary element to it, so I had every single letter/newspaper clipping/note etc mapped out before I started writing

AND

my first Actual Kraken!Ed fic (sin is sacred again) because I needed a whole mind-map of which tentacle was doing what at any given time. (They all had names by the end of my outlining process. I got.... possibly irrationally attached to certain tentacles after I named them)

#27: Is there a fic you were nervous to post/share? Why?

Oh, my god. SO many???? Maybe every fic I've ever written? I think I have the same anticipation and nerves before sharing each fic of mine that I have before going on stage. It's not.... it's not stage-fright or a genuine worry that I didn't write something I'm proud of, because I AM proud of everything I've published. It's more that... I've put so much love into what I've created, I'm all aflutter thinking that someone out there is going to feel that love, and then I've been able to willingly fling myself into the terrifying ordeal of being known.

I will say, if I ever get back to writing JB fic (if the gay pirates ever relinquish their hold on my brain), I do have a WEIRD wip that I originally planned to publish anon-style. However, now that I've written multiple tentacle fics and bodyswapping and some of the most explicit and weird shit I've ever written (affectionate)... I'm a lot less afraid of just slapping my name on it and letting people deal with it. 😂

Fanfic Writer Asks!

[monstermaster13]

Rise Of The Dum Dum Plague

NOTE: This is a were-aykroyd transformation story that features ‘dum dumification’, weight gain, flatulence, and body horror-esque elements as well as weirdness in general, if you don’t like crude humor then I suggest reading some other stories instead.

When Nathan first got his were-aykroyd powers he didn’t know that he would end up being stuck in the middle of his worst nightmare, his nightmares were always of that specific type of were-aykroyd…a gluttonous stupid looking one known as a ‘dum dum’, which he hated, he hated what dum dums represented, the utterly disgusting almost hedonistic worship of their own body fat, their flatulence, how they took what to him was cool like being a were-aykroyd and making a grotesque mockery out of them.

It all started back when the master from his original world tormented him with a nightmare, a nightmare of turning into a fat stupid were-aykroyd at a concert to humiliate him, yes he acted like loved him, but said master or the ‘creator’ as he was called, clearly had other intentions for him. Since then he had become afraid of becoming like that.

Luckily for a while after that he never had to deal with it often, at least unless on certain lunar dates or if he ate too much, the were-aykroyd dum dum always came out when hunger was involved, hunger was his motivation, he wanted to always grow out of Nathan.

Nathan went from universe to universe and master to master to find a master who would actually love him, and when he did, he found one who initially viewed him as a pet but the relationship became like that of a parent and child, and of course he’d feed him and care for him, what made this relationship even better was the fact he was a fellow were-aykroyd and he could help him with his problems.

What seemed like a perfect ordeal for him eventually started to become worse when Nathan came home one afternoon to see his master looking rather different than normal, his master was in the state of being a dum dum were-aykroyd, watching a television show about dum dums.

He couldn’t believe what he saw..it looked like some kind of weird fake commercial for something called ‘dum dum food’ which was some type of were-aykroyd food, what made it different from human food was anyone’s guess but it was still odd to see. He was disgusted at what he saw, fat dum dum were-aykroyds eating the food, forcing others to eat it and making them into dum dums too.

Nathan tried to switch the channels and he flicked through various channels, dum dum were-aykroyds popping up on every channel as if this was some kind of bad Twilight Zone parody episode. The dum dums seemed to have invaded every channel.

He switched over to a documentary channel…hoping to see a soothing natural documentary featuring the calming presence of David Attenborough, and he did and he then saw a documentary about were-aykroyds, and he saw those dum dums again.

“Dum dums again?”

“Aren’t these dum were-aykroyds delightful?”

“Uh no they are disgusting.”

“But you will like them.”

His master lumbered over to him…’What has gotten into you, master? You definitely do not seem like yourself.’ ‘I am fine, I am a very good dum dum and you shall be a dum dum too!’ ‘What? A dum dum? But I don’t…’ ‘Oh but you will.’

There was something off about this, he groaned as he walked towards Nathan in a slow dum dum manner, making odd noises as he did so…’You’re a…a..’ ‘A dum dum, yes, I am. A good dum dum were-aykroyd and I want you to be a dum too!’ ‘I will never be like you.’ ‘Oh but you will, you will become very stupid and you will like it.’

This terrified him as he started to run and headed upstairs, he panicked as his master tried to chase him, his body swelling and growing as dangerously gassy farts emitted from his behind, letting off an awful smell that could be detected from anywhere in the apartment.

His master was growing bigger and fatter, as he became a bigger and fatter were-aykroyd, sniffing him and stalking him. ‘Come on now, let’s both be happy dum dums together.’ What was even more disturbing was that his master’s intelligence was dwindling even more along with his humanity, and Nathan felt sorry for him.

Nathan hurried upstage and tried to hide as the dummifying were-aykroyd that was his master stalked him, his master’s mind slowly shrinking away even further, and affecting his behavior..making him think that Nathan was his boyfriend, horrified about this…Nathan made a run for it and attempted to fight back.

At this point, his master was acting like an overgrown infant as he was crawling towards Nathan..feeling like he needed to love and infect him, he made a run for it and attempted to run before he encountered the dumbed up version of his master. ‘Hehe, does my boyfriend wanna play with dum dum?’ ‘Oh no, I don’t.’

The sight of the dummified version of his master frightened him, he was a massive were-aykroyd, one that was considered fatter than normal ones, he looked ridiculous and talked in a silly manner but what unsettled him the most was that the master that he had loved the most, was now lost, lost and trapped in the body of a dum dum.

He tried to look up the cure for his master’s condition and he found out it was a plague that was spreading throughout town, the plague had been spreading for multiple nights, turning humans into these goofy plus sized food addicted were-aykroyds and he knew that he was likely to be next, he hopped it wouldn’t come to that.

The dum dum version of his master lumbered towards him before crying, it was obviously he was trying to control himself but he couldn’t, the dum dum were-aykroyd that used to be his master was not in control of his body, he stopped for a bit as Nathan found the cure for it and he worked on making the cure.

Making the cure for his master, he presented his master with a bottle of sorts containing the cure and the antidote…the master reached for the drink and drank it, the drink’s contents slowly turning him back to normal, Nathan stood there, relieved.

However the relief turned to horror as he hurried down to the kitchen to find what appeared to be ‘dum dum’ cookies and dum dum were-aykroyd food in the fridge, he screamed as he saw what appeared to be a horde of were-aykroyd dums, all grotesquely rotound and hungry.

The dum dums break into his apartment through the door and groaned, all of them wanting to come near him. ‘There is the dummy, he must join us, he must join us.’ ‘Yes, be a dum dum were-aykroyd like us.’ ‘I will never be like you, you’re disgusting.’ ‘You will eat like us, you will feed with us, you will be like us.’

Nathan attempted to make a run for it and attempted to fight the dum dums, knowing that the dum dums would probably be too stupid to try and do anything back, but one of the dum dums grabbed him and touched him, he felt uncomfortable being around these dum dums.

He attempted to fight them off only to find himself clutching his stomach which was growling and gurgling, as it began to swell and inflate..his shirt slowly began to get tighter as he began to think about the cookies, thinking of those cookies made him feel hungrier than he normally would be as he couldn’t help but think about eating them. ‘Those dum dum cookies sure look good. Good enough to eat. And I must eat, I must eat and be a good dum dum for master.’

The words that came out of his mouth sounded alien to him, like he wasn’t usually this hungry, that’s when he saw his stomach swelling and growing even more, inflating with fat as brown hairs grew on them. ‘There was no way that was me who said that, that sounded dumb, like something those dum dum were-aykroyds would say.’

Yet he felt like he needed those cookies and he couldn’t help but digging into them, feeling the need to eat more and more of them, as he did..he belched loudly after each better, producing more and more belches after each cookie he ate, he couldn’t stop eating them. His shirt buttons slowly strained and puckered before popping off, he panicked as he stopped eating.

Looking at his shirt, he could it see it straining and slowly tearing apart as his chest and torso swelled and broadened, hairs growing on both as his arms slowly broadened and grew hairs on them as well. He groaned and attempted to get his shirt off only for it to slowly rip apart to exposure his upperbody and fattening belly.

He couldn’t help but rub his inflating stomach, cradling it and patting it as his hands enlarged and grew hairs on them, the fat was spreading all over his body and making his clothes grow tighter and tighter. He groaned as his stomach gurgled, he suddenly was finding the idea of eating dum dum food to be a good one as he began to feel incredibly hungry for the taste of it, he reached for the bucket of dum dum food and he started to chow down on what was inside.

His shoes slowly began to strain as his feet slowly swelled and grew, a loud snap was heard as his shoes burst apart, revealing his much larger feet, two of the toes on both feet sticking at the knuckle and giving him webbed toes. He watched as his pants slowly started to strain, his belt was straining as well as his belly inflated even more, pushing against his belt. ‘Hehe, dum dum loves to watch his belly grow and burst through a belt, tee hee! Oh no, why am I doing that?’ ‘Because you’re becoming one of us, a big fat happy dum dum.’ ‘I can’t be a dum dum, i’m intelligent.’

Nathan panicked and he attempted to stop himself from turning dum dum but he heard the gurgling in his stomach as he kept eating and eating, feeding on the cookies and the dum dum food, his rear slowly swelling and growing with fat as it pushed against his jeans, making his pants feel tighter on his growing behind.

His jeans slowly got tighter and tighter as his legs thickened as his rear enlarged, several loud gaseous farts emitting from his behind…’Tee hee, I love eating and growing. Master loves a good dum dum who loves to eat, tee hee hee! Oh no, please no…no.’ His jeans started ripping at the seams due to his fattening rear.

Instinctively he chuckled as he saw how large he was growing, his belt slowly snapping apart due to his stomach threatening to burst through it, which it did…bursting right through it. He rubbed his new stomach…’Do you like your stomach, dum dum?’ ‘Yes, my stomach is very big and soft, master. Wait, i’m acting like a dum dum, I shouldn’t be acting like one.’

He felt sick so he ran upstairs to the bathroom, when he went into the bathroom he closed the door and he reached into the toilet and threw up, coughing up the dum dum food, the dum dum food that had been spewed turned into another dum dum food piece which floated into his mouth, and forced itself down his throat.

Nathan attempted to spit the food out, and he spat it out only for said dum dum food piece to slowly morph into a miniature dum dum were-aykroyd in a manner that looked like something out of Hellraiser. It was an odd looking creature, very much like a not-quite-deformed pygmy were-aykroyd who looked equally as goofy offspring of the bigger were-aykroyd, and it unnerved him.

He couldn’t help but make odd dum dum sounds as more and more farts expelled from his rear as his jeans ripped apart, leaving him in his underwear, he was embarrassed, he couldn’t stop farting and laughing at his own farts. He felt like an idiot, a very stupid one at that.

That is when he saw even more weight that was being piled on to his body as he slowly elevated in height to 6’1 and his shoulders and back broadened, he felt like he was getting a bit too heavy for his own good and that he was going to explode out of his shorts. He groaned as his neckline felt funny due to his neck swelling and filling up with fat as he developed sort of a double-chin.

He gasped as his hair slowly lengthened and darkened, his forehead elevated itself up as his eyebrows thickened, his eyes widened as one turned from brown to green, his nose enlarged and developed a cleft in the middle as his lips slowly became kissable. His features slowly contorting to those of Dan Aykroyd as his face plumped up, giving him the appearance of having a chubby cuddly looking face.

Nathan couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw himself in the bathroom mirror, he was a large portly, hairy, dum dum were-aykroyd! He screamed when he saw his reflection, his voice deepening and altering to sound Aykroydian but also sounding very silly as well. He held his head for a little bit as he got a head-ache, he was beginning to have trouble thinking, he got out his phone and tried to call them for help but he couldn’t remember their phone numbers.

His mind was shifting and it was making him uncomfortable, making him having odd thoughts that felt very dum dum, his human intelligence was gradually being overtaken by the dum dum personality that was making him think about food. ‘Dum dum loves food. Does my dum dum love to eat food?’ ‘Yes, dum dum loves to grow, i’m, such a big happy dum dum for you, master!’

The dum dum mannerisms slowly spread more and more into his mind, making him feel more and more silly and hungry, like all he wanted to do was grow, feed, transform and spread his dum dum goodness to all of the helpless humans. ‘Hehehe, dum dum loves growing.’

A couple of seconds later and the dum dum mentality took over him completely, making him feel like he was extremely silly and also that he was a were-aykroyd. ‘I must remember who I am, i’m Nathan, i’m a scientist, i’m a human.’ ‘Silly dum dum, it’s so cute that you are pretending that you are a human, you have always been a dum dum.’ ‘No I haven’t, i’m human…my name is Nathan.’

“Silly dum dum, you are a dum dum, just like us!”

“A dum dum? But i’m human.”

“You are a good dum dum were-aykroyd and you love being my dum dum.”

‘I am a human..i’m human…I, am a dum dum who loves being your dum dum! No wait, no i’m not, get it together Nathan.’ ‘Aaaw look at you, my dum dum is trying to hold onto the belief he is a human and not a were-aykroyd! You are such a good were-aykroyd, and so silly too, tee hee!’ ‘You monster! How about you stop this right now or i’ll make you stop. You are a horrible were-aykroyd master and deserve to suffer!’

“That is no way for a dum dum to behave. Now say you’re sorry, dum dum.”

“Never! I hate this dum dum body, I hate this dum dum life, why can’t I be a were-aykroyd who is not a dum dum? It is not fair I have to be stuck as a dum dum, it is no fair at all!”

He protested, attempting not to lose his mind but ultimately he found himself giving in to the dum dum mindset as he felt less and less intelligent and goofer and dum-dumier each time, his human intelligence and memories of being human were replacing themselves, not completely though as he was still himself, his transformation completed itself and he was now fully a dum dum were-aykroyd, well mostly outward appearance and mannerisms wise but he was himself still and could still think, it’s just he had the ‘dum dum’ instincts inside him. This was horrifying for him, he was in the body of this grotesque gluttonous stupid were-aykroyd and he couldn’t control this body, this body acted on its own without any warning or hesitation.

The dum dum were-aykroyd pushed open the door to the bathroom with his massive hands, walking down the halls and down the stairs until he stopped at the bottom and arrived at the kitchen, that is where he saw his master and he instinctively cuddled him in a dum dum way. ‘I am sorry master, I am sorry this had to happen.’ He broke down in tears but his master comforted him…’There there, it’s okay.’

Nathan couldn’t bear to look at himself, when he first got his were-aykroyd powers he wasn’t expecting this, he wasn’t expecting to be turned into the dum dum form, he couldn’t stand dum dums and thought they were an utter joke and an insult to were-aykroyds, but here he was..as one of them himself. He wasn’t in control of his own body, he was stuck there on the inside as the dum dum were-aykroyd body occasionally acted on his own.

Which included raiding the fridge as if he was Slimer and very much eating everything in it and raiding stores, he remembered the first time this happened..he was spotted, on live tv, as a dum dum were-aykroyd and he felt embarrassed when he saw himself on tv like that.

That dum dum were-aykroyd who stared at him blankly and dumbly with that messy hair and goofy expression, if that was who he was to become every night from this point on, he definitely feared that he’d eventually become too stupid to even remember being human or even remember his name, he looked at himself and sobbed. ‘I’m gross and stupid, this isn’t how a were-aykroyd should be. I should be something cool like a conehead alien or a ghostbuster but here I am being a dum dum, who is fat and stupid and eeeew.’ ‘Well yes you could have, but you would have complained about that as well.’ the other dum dum were-aykroyd responded. ‘Ugh, I hate this dum dum form, I just hope it lasts for a night and I’ll turn back to normal in the morning!’

He sighed, thinking of how much he dreaded this form and how he wished he could have been a much better were-aykroyd, being stuck in the proverbial backseat while this gluttonous were-aykroyd took over the driver’s seat and took control of him, was a nightmare for him, he felt like this form wasn’t him at at all.

The dum dum he saw in the mirror wasn’t him, he was..this large, hairy were-aykroyd who was addicted to food. He felt like he had been degraded into being a useless animal, he felt like he was in those cow transformation stories in which the victim lost their intelligence and their ability to speak and could only be flatulent and gross because that’s how all of those stories would often be.

‘This isn’t me..this isn’t me. This is a dum dum were-aykroyd, not me.’ He kept telling himself, of course he was right, he was still himself mentally, it’s just he had the on and off again dum dum instincts which he had trouble controlling and it was going to make his horrific experience all the worse.

He poked his round stomach and felt embarrassed…surely this plague would not be one that would be lasting for a while, he turned on the tv and a news report came on in the style of Weekend Update, complete with Chevy Chase. ‘Good evening i’m Chevy Chase and you’re not, tonight’s top story. A strange plague has been going around that is causing people to be turned into goofy plus sized were-aykroyds who are very much like the character Homer Simpson. This situation is not unlike last year’s Treehouse of Horror segment Lout Break.’

On the screen Chevy was sitting at the newsdesk giving the news as one of the news reporters had been turned into a were-aykroyd dum dum and tried to chase him. ‘It is advised not to go any places were-aykroyd dums dums are including restaurants that may contain dum dum food, and it is advised not to leave the house when dum dum gas is around.’ the camera cut off before the dum dum were-aykroyd reporter got near him.

Chevy yelped…’And that’s the news for this evening, good night!’ as the were-aykroyd dum dum reporter grabbed him and hugged him before belching in his face, turning him into a goofy were-aykroyd that resembled a big cuddly version of his friend Dan Aykroyd.

“Aaaw crap.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Master, we’ve got a dum dum plague on our hands now.”

And so the beginning of the dum dum plague had started, spreading throughout the neighbourhood and turning all the human citizens of Oakendale into hungry, goofy, plus sized dum dum were-aykroyds who were obsessed with food. And now he was one of them, but he wasn’t like them, he was still himself and he didn’t lose his mind, however he felt like he was going to.

He was lost in this nightmare of dumbness and were-aykroydism, and he felt like he wasn’t able to recover from it, he sighed as he sat himself down on the couch and decided to rest for the night, he had become tired from all the eating he had done as a were-aykroyd, so he drifted off to sleep, laying on the couch.

As he slept on the couch, he tossed back and forth, having nightmares of the dum dum were-aykroyd version of himself he saw in the mirror, unable to control himself in said nightmares. Eventually the nightmares subsided as he slept throughout the night.

When the moon went down and the sun arose the next morning, he yawned as he awoke…’That was a horrific experience, I hope never to experience this again. But I guess i’m going to have to do this every night in this universe until I can find a way to contain the dum dum were-aykroyd.’

He looked around, the dum dum were-aykroyds were gone, there was only him and his master in the apartment together, he looked at himself in the mirror for a bit, seeing the dum dum were-aykroyd from the night before, but that was before he morphed back into his human form. ‘Phew, much better. I hated that body. But I guess I'm going to have to be stuck with that in this universe until I can find a way to either fix it or control it!’ ‘Good morning. Did you sleep well?’ ‘Well, uh..yes, master..I did but I had a nightmare about turning into a dum dum were-aykroyd, this new form I am going to end up turning into each night is terrifying and I do not like it.’

“There there, it is quite alright.”

“Oh, master…I love you!”

Nathan hugged his ‘master’ as he got up and got dressed before getting over to the kitchen to make breakfast. After making and eating breakfast he headed to work at the paranormal research facility, this universe’s version of Oakendale was different from his usual home, but at least he could make the most out of it.

He spent the day recovering from his nightmarish dum dum experience as he worked hard in the lab, working on new projects, it was a very strange world he had gotten himself into but at the very least, he was in one he could get accustomed to overtime and he felt happy with this world.

However, over at where the local bakery was..a dark were-aykroyd in a delivery boy uniform with boxes of the dum dum cookies, he placed the cookie boxes on the stand and gave them to a were-aykroyd dum dum baker. ‘The first step of the plan is complete. With the dum dum plague going around and turning people into dum dum were-aykroyds, we are going to make sure that these cookies and dum dum foods in general get sold in no time at all. And of course this will help us get more potential were-aykroyds to join us.’

He pulled out a phone from his pocket and he made a call..’Alright boss, stage two of the plan is ready. We’ve got all the cookies ready and they’re being sold, we shall soon have Nathan as a dum dum in no time.’ ‘Excellent.’

The were-aykroyd put the phone back in his pocket and walked off before hopping into a delivery truck and driving off into a disclosed location, he arrived at the location and jumped out, handing the cookie boxes to another group of were-aykroyds. ‘I’ve got the cookies ready, all the stores are selling them.’ ‘Excellent, the boss will see you now.’

He pressed a button on the wall which opened a doorway to a secret area, which of course was a high-tech dark were-aykroyd lair, he walked through the halls of the lair and over to what appeared to be a room of sorts dedicated to Christmas with a vegas type vibe, Mariah Carey’s hit song ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’ was blaring out of the speakers.

The dum dum were-aykroyd made his way towards a special office that was located in this room and that is where he saw the ‘boss’, the boss turned around, revealing himself to be Vic Frohmeyer, who was the leader of the Aykroydnastiums (a rival group to Nathan’s Aykroydantium hero group). ‘Excellent work, with these cookies being sold throughout the city and with the dum dum plague, we shall have an army of dum dums in no time.’ ‘Thank you, sir.’ ‘No problem.’

Vic smiled as he turned to inform the others…’Nathan may have defeated us last time but there is no way he will able to stop us in this universe. The dum dum plague is spreading and each night we will make more and more dum dums to serve us. These dum dum were-aykroyds will serve us well.’

“What about Nathan? What if he does try to stop us?”

“Well we’ll just make sure that his inner dum dum takes control.”

‘How? He is not like those dum dum were-aykroyds that live in this universe.’ ‘Oh don’t you worry about that, i’ve got that covered, dum dums have a way of working their magic on humans and fellow were-aykroyds, he shall be ours in no time.’ ‘Good.’ ‘And when he does become ours, he’ll be our were-aykroyd to control.’

‘Are you going to make him into a dum dum were-aykroyd to serve you?’ ‘Oh no, I have other were-aykroyd plans for him.’ Vic and all the dark were-aykroyds laughed maniacally as they reveled in their hideous plan.

Back in Oakendale, Nathan had finished work when he returned home later in the afternoon, in the evening he decided to relax and take it easy, he remained alert and vigilant though, for he knew those dum dums would make a return again soon. But he decided to take it easy, and rest up for a bit before making himself an early dinner.

And that is where the ending of this part of the saga comes in, he had now become a permanent resident of this new universe and of this new home, it was like his usual home and his usual universe but different and special in its own way, and even though he now would have to deal with dum dum were-aykroyds every night, he didn’t mind this predicament.

In fact he genuinely liked this, he really liked this, it would take some time to get used to this strange new universe, but he grew used to it over time and he knew he could always count on his master to protect him.

Sometimes even though a new home can be scary, it is actually not difficult to get adjusted to it even if the challenges come at you more than they normally would, and that is something even were-aykroyds can learn too.

And thus the first chapter in the ‘dum dum plague’ saga, has come to a conclusion but beware dear viewers, for the plague is out there and so are the dum dum were-aykroyds. Remember not to eat any strange cookies that are irresistibly sweet or you’ll turn into a dum dum were-aykroyd too. And remember no matter what happens, if this story has offended you or frightened you, remember it’s just a story, and there is no such thing as were-

[chilipowder9]

Dad

tw: childhood trauma, abandonment issues, severe mommy issues, minor daddy issues, idk what it's called but that thing where you think you need to be [this] good to earn someone's love specifically here mentioned it's my dad, and one mention of considering suicide paired with a mention of it again to portray that it was (and still is) gone

this starts as an explanation of a couple things Dad did to me as a little kid that hurt me, then ways he tried to counter that, then the main point which made me understand that if no one else in my family loves me as I am, it's him; I will be labeling each part so if you want to only hear the happy parts or the main premise of this post you can skip

everything's under the cut

The Rough Edges

when I was super young, like, 4 to 10 young, he had no idea how to interact with a child, he was always gruff when talking to me, and it seemed he never had anything nice to say to me

he's always been on a strict work schedule and therefore was home every day but he never had enough time to spend time with me and learn who I was and keep up with my phases through life

Mom was always worse when he wasn't home, I don't want to get into it in this post since that's not the point of it, but she was really rough, but when he was home she was nearly a saint and protected me from his gruffness, so despite being so harsh with me, I idolized her and wanted to one day be good enough to be loved both by the fact that I am her child and for who I am

Him Trying His Best

he started to find ways to connect with me as I got older, each time we were in the car we would try to talk, it was awkward at first, but over time we bonded over music, then videogames, then slowly more and more

he started to see my personality in the things I did, he started to relate to me in any way whatsoever, I started to understand why he was "so mean," I started to understand that to have a relationship with him I needed to be the one to reach out because he's never known anything else

this kept going and getting better and better with my relationship with my mom staying the same kind of rocky until December 2022

The Context Needed For The Point

not much, but some, please read this so the point makes sense

I was in a relationship my family did not like, I had my tech on severe lockdown, but still not quite taken away, I was allowed to speak with her but only with them around, the comfort of falling asleep with someone was going to be taken away... except I had my brother's old phone he would have thrown away and wifi to talk to her on

the rest of the context is that Dad has to get of at the buttcrack of dawn to go to work

The Point

I was on the phone with my at the time girlfriend (she abandoned me two days after this, no it wasn't ghosting, I wish she would have ghosted me) I remember it so vividly I was on the phone and I genuinely believed I would not have survived the next day, that Mom would finally have weighed down on me so much that I was going to end it all and I begged her to help me relax just for a moment before I had to struggle the next day (there's a lot of toxicity please don't ask) it was five in the morning and we were arguing with me trying to get her to understand I wasn't saying about my worry to guilt her into helping, I sincerely believed I would not have survived the next day

Dad heard me yelling in my room, stormed in, and freaked out, he barely gave me a chance to explain and honestly the entire ordeal was a blur, I remember begging, I remember feeling like he hated me, and I remember being terrified he would tell Mom

then he began to walk out of the room to leave for work, and something came over me, I haven't the slightest clue what, not the slightest idea in the world, but as he was walking out the door

"hey.. wait!"

"what?" he turns glaring at me, with every look of "you dare speak to me?" on his face

"can... can I have a hug?"

he paused for a moment, but that man pushed his anger to the side, settled his stomping, lowered his voice, and came to hug me

he came and he hugged me, telling me, "I used to do some stupid things when I was your age too, y'know... that's not good but we're gonna get through this and you're going to get better... but I want you to know I still love you"

and that

that right there is what saved me from committing suicide that morning

he paused every emotional response to my betrayal of his trust, and he reminded me that he loves me, and I can't remember for certain if it were here or in one of our car conversations but he ended up telling me he was proud of me despite that

my dad is every reason I stay in this house and serve the family, my dad is every reason I am alive, my dad is every reason I find to get up in the morning, my dad is why I take care of my body, my dad is why I try to take care of my mind

my dad is why I feel so safe around punks; he was a thrasher in the 90s, he may not have been a punk (and he's really elitist with saying punk died with Green Day and that "nowadays punks are just a bunch of pussies trying to fight for bullshit issues behind a little screen") but he was one of those people that was only not punk because he didn't appreciate community because he had a fuck the world because it fucked me mentality

[diervorn]

So I did my first run of Body Count from the perspective of my boy Maddox "Mads" Ward! (I'll be going through with new perspectives to see how other characters develop, too!) Under the cut because oops, I got excited!

Personal

It was born from a desire to change himself! Mads has never been one to hog the spotlight before; the mortifying ordeal of being known by thousands of strangers is terrifying for him, but he pushed himself to make a big shift for the sake of expanding his comfort zone! He maintains the day-to-day operations of a boarding house that's also his home, so interpersonal connection comes with the territory!

He's from a small (fictional!) town deep in the Pacific Northwest called Timber Lake. Tons of forested areas and greenery where everybody knows everybody, so living in an isolated island paradise is a big change!

His mom and sister were both enthusiastically supportive, but his prickly little brother (emotionally constipated to the nth degree) chose to express his worry by chewing him out for going on a stupid, shallow show made for stupid, shallow people, haha! On the day he was supposed to leave, Mads gave everyone the biggest bear hug possible and Theo didn't want to let go. 🥺

Mom Friend frfr. Total mother hen, eternal designated driver, needs to feel useful at all times or he'll explode.

Wholesome boy next door! Mads is big, all long limbs and broad shoulders, and it's as if to soften his intimidating stature that he dresses down as much as possible. This is a sweater boy through and through, no tatts or piercings to speak of (at least, not after The Incident™)

He owns several dogs he picked up as strays and just couldn't let go of them!

Relationships

Mads' partner was Vinh! He encountered them while he was busy, uhh, acclimating (read: having a panic attack) to the new environment, and they were able to talk him through it. Since then, he's been smitten, albeit very conscious of their boundaries and being careful not to overstep past what they're comfortable with.

He's a diehard monogamist and will stay loyal till the end, but if his current partner were to break things off, he'd respect their decision and do his best to make a connection with someone else! His romantic ideal of soulmates is in tension with his belief that there could be multiple people right for you if you're open to it, so who really knows what the future holds?

Our mans is attracted to hot messes in human form; he's a fixer, a caretaker, he sees a problem and he's already thinking about ways to solve it. He loves dreamers, folks with their head in the clouds, because it's such a contrast to how he's always focused on the practical, the tactile, things that are right in front of him that he can see and touch. He admires people who have a strong sense of self and know exactly what they want in life, even and especially if they end up making a bit (or a lot) of a mess in getting there.

He really gets along with Adegoke! There was someone else he really felt was a kindred spirit, but, well...

Image below for illustrative purposes.

The Real Body Count Was The Friends We Made Along the Way

"Oh God oh God oh God oh God oh fuck fuck fuckfuckfuckfuck I need to do something I need to help they could still be okay come on you need to move why aren't you moving just MOVE." Repeat ad infinitum!

Not partners, but he really did feel a connection with them! Because his ego was stung at Vinh not initially picking him, he found Ellis' contrasting openness to be charming and endearing! If their partnership didn't work out, Mads could have easily imagined a future with Ellis, at least had he been given the chance to get to know them better.

He really wanted to believe it was just an injury, to the point of denying what he saw and his gut instinct. The comfort of hoping he'd still have the opportunity to see and speak to them again was too powerful to give up. (And then, well...)

The idea of suspecting anyone makes him sick to his stomach, but right now, Atticus hasn't been doing anything to foster any trust. It might be too obvious and on-the-nose, but Mads is an extremely emotionally-driven character whose heart rules over his head in basically all things, and he can't get the image of Atticus standing over the body and doing nothing out of his head.

No. Never. ... is his immediate, kneejerk response, but hey, in the heat of the moment, if lives are on the line and there's no other way? Heart over head. The reality of it, even through self-defense or protecting others, would leave him absolutely shattered beyond measure.

Bonus?

He's actually got a childhood sweetheart he's still holding a torch for, though they haven't seen each other in many years. Part of him will always keep that connection close, even if he finds someone new in the process.

The Great British Bake Off counts as reality TV even if it's not romance, yeah?

Body Count Asks

Hey, I'm Coco, and @bodycountgame is one of my favorite interactive fiction! I would love to know about your MC

📝Let's get personal 📝

What about the reality show intrest your MC? What's was their occupation?

Where is your MC from?

How did their family react to the sudden decision to be on reality TV?

Reality TV ain't all Reality.... what's a trope that describes your MC the best. (Villain, Girl/Boy/Person next door, airhead...)

Describe their style! I mean hair, tattoos, piercings, the WHOLE NINE YARDS.

Wild card!

❤️ Relationships 🧡

Who did your MC partner up with? And why??

Speaking of body count..... is your MC planning on being loyal or are their going to hop to the next one..

What's their type?

Not every relationship is sexual! Right now who's your MCs bestie?

..... who's their worstie?? 👀

💀There's been a MURDER Injury 💀

How did they react? Inner dialog and all

What was their relationship with the victim... were they partners.

Did they believe that Ellis was alive? Or did they call it out?

Who does your MC think did it? Like number 1 on their suspect list... why...?

If it comes to down to it... can your MC add a body to their body count?

BONUS: Any juicy details you got on your MC?

BONUS²: A iconic reality TV meme that describes your MC

[yeonjunszn]

BALANCE GAME — 19

PAIRING 𖦹 choi beomgyu x f!reader

SUMMARY 𖦹 choi beomgyu’s life was relatively simple. he woke up, went to class, met up with you (his best friend since 6th grade) for coffee, helped you manage the school’s radio station, co-hosted a talk show on said radio station with two of his closest friends and repeat. but when the show gets a question that asks whether he’d rather fall in love with a complete stranger or someone he’s known forever, choi beomgyu’s relatively simple life becomes extremely complicated.

MORE 𖦹 i’m genuinely so sad that this is coming to an end 💔

˙𖦹 ⋆꙳ ໑ ᮫࣭ ꩜ ｡⋆༄

it was easier to speak things into existence rather than to physically do them. you were well aware of this fact of life. but this was the first time you had ever truly experienced it.

you woke up this morning with a single goal in mind; confessing your feelings to beomgyu. and you’d kept that goal in your mind without hesitation. you felt confident in yourself today. you were gonna lay your soul bare to him, leave all your cards on the table.

until about an hour ago.

reality crept in and hit you like a ton of bricks, a freight train, whatever you wanted to call it. there was a very real chance that this entire ordeal wouldn’t work out in your favor. and there were also a plethora of issues with your plan that could go badly. for one, yunjin could figure out that she was given the wrong time and show up while you were there and most likely embarrass you. two, beomgyu could find out that heeseung messaged her the wrong time and most likely embarrass you. three, he could just not feel the same and most likely embarrass you. to make matters worse, it had been raining on and off all day.

most scenarios you created in your head ended with you being embarrassed, which was something you definitely didn’t need while trying to hype yourself up. you spent your entire time getting ready completely overthinking the situation, despite wanting to just go with the flow like chaeryeong suggested.

as simple as it seemed, confessing to your best friend was probably the scariest thing you’d ever do. he was the person who saw you at your best and at your worst, your pretty and your ugly. he knew you in and out like the back of his hand and you think that’s what made it so terrifying.

if he knew all of that, if he knew the real you, and he didn’t want you, you’d be devastated. what would you do then? how would you recover from that? even though your friends continued to encourage you and tell you that he felt the same, you couldn’t help but doubt it just a little.

you never saw the signs. if you were so close to him, why did you never pick up on it? was it because you were too absorbed in your spiraling? too oblivious to the feelings of others while you were figuring out your own?

whatever the reason, it was too late to dwell on it. you needed to get your shit together and gather the bravery to spill your secret to him.

you arrive outside the coffee shop with your heart in your throat thirty minutes before two, only to find that beomgyu himself was also early. he was sitting at a table alone, his hands clasped together and his knees bouncing under the table. he glances around the shop curiously, taking in the atmosphere while he waits for ‘yunjin’.

you take a deep breath in and exhale out as you push open the door, the little bell above ringing in the announcement of your entrance. you drop your umbrella in the holder beside the door and when he looks in your direction, you’re already making your way towards him, confusing him even further.

“y/n? what are you doing here?” beomgyu asks with furrowed brows as you sit in front of him.

“i’m here for you.” you say matter-of-factly, gripping the edge of your chair nervously. his eyes widen slightly at your forwardness.

“what do you—”

“beomgyu, i’m in love with you,” you blurt, cutting him off and out goes any of the original confession you had planned. “and i’m sitting here right now because i can’t bear the thought of you being with anyone else.” it feels like time has stopped and it’s just the two of you in your own world. simultaneously, it feels like everyone is staring at you and the abruptness of your confession. you wholeheartedly wanted this to go as smoothly as possible, but it feels almost like ripping off a bandaid rather than gliding butter on bread.

his lips are parted and his knees are no longer bouncing. the sight unnerves you astronomically, pressing your palms harshly into the plastic cushion of your seat. he doesn’t say anything for a while, just looking at you with a million emotions flashing over his features. you debate between giving him time to collect his thoughts and just leaving, but after a few minutes, your chest feels like it’s about to concave on itself.

“i’m— uh— i’m just gonna go— pretend i never said anything—” you choke out, wincing at the loud scraping sound the legs of the chair make when you stand.

you force yourself to stumble out of the coffee shop, embarrassed just as you predicted, without so much as a glance backwards. your eyes are glassy and you don’t even know where you’re walking to, but you had to get as far away from there as you could. and to ice the cake, you forgot your umbrella inside the café just as it had started to rain again.

“y/n, wait!”

you nearly trip over your own feet when his voice reaches your ears, out of breath and desperate. your sweater and skirt are soaked, your hair is drenched, your socks are wet, and you can’t see a lot thanks to the mixture of rain water and tears coating your eyelashes, but in spite of that, you still stop and turn around. he’s holding an umbrella over his head, one hand on his knee while he hunches over to regain his composure.

once he does, he’s taking big strides over to you, tossing his umbrella aside so he’s also being doused in the precipitation pouring down on you. “you didn’t let me speak.”

“i didn’t know you were going to, you were silent and i—”

he reaches out to shush you, pursing his lips together. “i was trying to come up with the perfect words to say how i feel, but i couldn’t. there are no words in the korean language to describe the amount of love i feel for you, y/n, to describe the amount of love i’ve felt for you for years now. it’s kinda stupid that it took answering a balance game question for me to realize it, but i’m grateful i did. i’d do anything and everything for you in a heartbeat.”

“w-why did you agree to going out with yunjin then?” you ask with a frown, holding his wrist when his hand moves to cup your cheek, his thumb grazing your bottom lip gently.

“you know me, i’m an idiot,” he snorts. “i thought you were leagues out of mine and honestly felt like too much of a coward to confess to you. i didn’t want to ruin things between us, even if i was contradicting my own beliefs. you’ve always been there and i couldn’t think of what it’d be like if i said something and suddenly you weren’t. i guess i agreed because i was trying to distract myself from those possibilities.”

“gyu,” you smile with a small chuckle, resting your forehead on his chest and wrapping your arms around his neck. you look up at him, your chin placed on his damp t-shirt. “i kept denying my feelings for you for the same reasons. i didn’t want it to come in the middle of us. i thought you were too good for me, that you deserved better than what i could give you. and then— then yunjin came along and she was just so nice and the complete opposite of me and i could tell she liked you, so i gave up. i was so fucking defeated because, of course, it had to happen right after i realized i was in love with you and i assumed i’d lost my chance. but when you told me you were going on a date with her, i couldn’t stand back anymore, i had to tell you. i didn’t want to wonder whether or not i’d made a mistake for the rest of my life.”

“when did you realize?”

“last weekend. i had been mulling it over the whole day until you picked me up for that mixer and i saw all those girls talking to you and i got so jealous,” you admit sheepishly. “but then you practically ignored them the minute i was free again and it made me so giddy. i felt like the only girl in the world in that moment and it solidified everything for me. i knew then.”

you’re sure the two of you probably look like psychopaths to the strangers of seoul walking past you with their umbrellas giving them shelter, keeping them bone dry, while you stood in the center of the sidewalk embracing each other under the pelting rain. however, you couldn’t care less. this was the happiest and fullest you’d felt in weeks.

“i’m so glad you did,” beomgyu pecks the top of your head lovingly. “and please don’t compare yourself to anyone else. if i had to choose, i’d pick you a thousand times. it’s always gonna be you, i’m always gonna love you. you’re it for me, y/n.”

at this point, you’re not sure if the water streaming down your face is the weather above or if you’re crying. for someone who was so sure he didn’t have the courage to confess his feelings, he had a way with words. your fingers tangle in his shaggy dripping hair and you pull his head down just enough that your noses brush the other’s, tilting your own to connect your lips sweetly.

it’s everything you ever dreamed of and more, your whole body buzzing with something so unfamiliar, but so fulfilling all at once. your heart feels warm, like you’re home after being away for a long time. and it makes sense why he’s so comforting to you, why it’s been so easy to succumb to his infectious smile and his silly laugh all these years. he’s perpetually been your home, even if you didn’t know it until now. he’ll forever be your home, the one you’ll constantly run to when life becomes unrelenting and when you achieve your greatest accomplishments, just like he has since sixth grade.

you wouldn’t have it any other way.

NINETEEN: i’d pick you a thousand times

PREV 𖦹 eighteen : abt to steal your man

NEXT 𖦹 twenty : i’ll be waiting

MASTERLIST

˙𖦹 ⋆꙳ ໑ ᮫࣭ ꩜ ｡⋆༄

TAGLIST 𖦹 @viagumi @wccycc @yeppeudau @hrtsforbeomgyu @amazinglyangie @lunaavity @bnhaikyu @kyanmeai @gyusbbl @bluebearybeom @captivq @jaxavance @jliea @xstarless-eyesx @dainsleif-when-playable @kaeslily @ashxxkook @dreamenvi @woncheecks @asunova @sunghoonmybeloved @calumsfringe @meiiiwa @blurredplatform @stellz581 @mingiholic @yhawnnzz @paragonofroyalty @invusblog @sansluvr @butterflx @openingssequence @outrologist @gyuville @bailies-me @txtbrainrot

[shslskaterboy]

YOU'RE SO RIGHT THOUGH Komahina truly is such a good ship and I feel like it's the one implied most in canon. The way they compliment each other, they remind me of a yin and yang. If you have the time for it I'd definitely love to hear your Saiouma thoughts too because Saiouma is definitely one of my favorite ships (I analyzed their characters way too hard and just fell for them)

Yes absolutely 🙏🙏🙏

Something I actually like about saiouma is kinda the opposite of Komahina, and that’s the lack of in-game subtext. I don’t just mean that in terms of romantic subtext, but also just who Ouma is as a character, since you get absolutely no concrete backstory for him, and don’t even know if you can trust the small tidbit you do get with DICE, and because of this he can kinda be whatever you want him to be. He is purposefully shrouded in mystery because the theme of the game is truth vs fiction, and I think his character was meant to exemplify that theme by being unknowable. I’ve seen the claim that Kokichi is just a knockoff Nagito but I don’t think that’s fair because I think he’s very purposefully the way he is.

That being said, I personally buy into the hc that he is anxious and has trust issues, which is why he constantly avoids the truth and acts out the way he does in game (Weeby News has a really good ouma analysis on YouTube I would highly recommend if you haven’t seen it)

This hc is sort of the hinge of why I love Saiouma, because this puts them in a position of understanding each other, both fearing the power of truth, albeit for different reasons. This along with what in-game context you do get from FTEs is what drives it for me. All of the other characters write off Kokichi as a trouble maker, bad news, purely antagonistic, but if you do all his FTEs then that makes Shuichi the only one to extend the courtesy of trying to get to know him.

That being said, unlike Komaeda, Ouma does NOT care to submit to the terrifying ordeal of being known- at first. He is having fun with Saihara, he’s definitely a little gay boy for Saihara, but he’s not revealing anything; of course Shuichi sees Kokichi as an enigma, or even a puzzle to solve, which is why he keeps coming back. However, over the course of all FTEs and his Salmon-mode ending, Shuichi comes to appreciate Ouma for who he is- lies and all- and agrees to meet Kokichi in his level, literally hand in hand.

Again we come back to the idea that this ship is very mailable, as is seen by the plethora or pre, post, and in-game art and fics. There are AUs left and right because there is just so much room for adaptation: people can pick and choose exactly what they want Saiouma to be to an incredible degree. Of course my preferred dynamic is always going to be the A+ banter that you get with the introvert/extrovert, and because they’re both anxious and insecure in their own ways, I think this enables some very cute content.

I’m the end I do tend to latch on to what existing canon content there is cuz that’s just how my brain works; they compliment and contrast each other because they both understand the gravity of truth and lies, and I think they end up understanding each others different ways of using them. I think there’s a lot of room for growth for both of them, and I think they’re both in a position to empower and uplift the other on their character arcs.

I do think the game could have done a better job of giving subtext that they might genuinely care for each other (much the way Komahina does) but I do understand the reasoning behind leaving it more open to interpretation. Either way I greatly appreciate the levels of creativity that come from saiouma shippers, and I will always be a sucker for phantom thief AUs 😅